As is well established in a previous story of mine where I went toe to toe with the seven foot six hundred pound monster, Apollo Apocalypse, I have been a fan of professional wrestling for some time. Now we’ve come to that oh so magical time of year were WrestleMania is fast approaching. I’ve been to WrestleMania twice. First in Orlando at WrestleMania 24.
Then last year in Atlanta at WrestleMania 27...
Kinda makes you wonder how a staged stunt spectacular like professional wrestling became as big as all this. Hmm… let’s discuss.
A hundred years ago the most popular sport in America was baseball. Baseball was beginning to develop, and basketball & football were not yet on the national scene. Wrestling, at the time, was both more dignified and scientific than boxing. But it is not the as same today. How’d it get that way.
Wrestling is the oldest sport in the world next to running. The Egyptians enjoyed wrestling as did the Greeks and Romans from whom we got Greco-Roman wrestling and the violent no-holds-barred pankration which often ended in death. In Japan sumo wrestling is as old as the culture itself and in India wrestling was called the King of Games. Native Americans staged wrestling contests long before European settlers arrived. Then in the nineteenth century Irish immigrants settling in Vermont brought wrestling with them. It had been a popular way of settling disputes in Ireland for years (seeing as wrestling is a pretty easy style of combat even when you’re hammered). In the next fifty years Vermont cultivated wrestling talent that would spread the world over.
In 1901 a fellow by the name of George Hackenschmidt was the wrestling toast of Europe. People were standing in line three blocks deep when he sold out the London Opera house in 1904. This was one of the first times women began attending sporting events. Hackenschmidt’s series of matches against American champion Frank Gotch marked the high point of professional wrestling as a competitive sport and also the beginning of the end of it’s genuine competition.
After losing to Hackenschmidt, Gotch paid another wrestler to injure George in a training match and as a result Gotch won their second match. The public got wind of the deception and wrestling’s popularity suffered. Not to mention the slow matches went on way too long. People would show up at seven pm expecting to watch an hour of wrestling and would still be waiting for a man’s hand to be raised midnight. Five years later when Gotch retired wrestling as a competitive sport was for all intents and purposes dead.
However it’s entertainment life was just beginning. During the Civil War grappling was a great way for both sides to pass the time. The idea of professional wrestling as an entertainment began post Civil War as a matter of fact. Vets who had learned the sport in the camps took their talents home and wrestled for money in county and traveling fairs that toured America. These shows were operated by showmen and con-artists who had a greater interest in money than in sport. They dressed their wrestlers in colorful costumes and created elaborate back stories to create interest. By the turn of the century the carnies were coming into growing towns and cities setting up offices and carving out territories as wrestling. It was at the hands of these promoters that true competition was choked out of the sport.
The first WrestleMania took place on March 31st, 1985 in Madison Square Garden in New York. The main event pitted the team of Hulk Hogan and Mr. T against the team of Roddy Piper and Paul Orndorff. The financial and critical success of the event cemented the then World Wrestling Federation as the top promotion in the US beating out such promotions as the National Wrestling Alliance and the American Wrestling Association. WrestleMania 2 came a year later and took place in three different cities. New York, Illinois, and California. All three venues hosted a number of match ups leading to the main event which saw WWF Champion Hulk Hogan defeat challenger King Kong Bundy in a steel cage match.
Even with all this success the panicle of the 1980s wrestling boom is considered to be WrestleMania 3. The entire state of Michigan was denied pay-per-view access to the event and people flocked to the Silverdome in masses setting a new indoor attendance record of the time at 93,173. Notable matches include the Intercontinental Championship match pitting Randy Savage against Ricky Steamboat as well as the iconic WWF Championship match in which champion Hulk Hogan lifted the 520 lb challenger Andre the Giant over his head and slammed him to the mat.
It was in the 90s that the WrestleMania first ventured out of the US. WrestleMania 6 took place in the Skydome in Toronto, Canada. In the main event The Ultimate Warrior defeated Hulk Hogan to become the new WWF Champion. WrestleMania 7 was moved from the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum to the Los Angeles Memorial Sports Arena for security reasons related to the Gulf War. It was here that the Undertaker made is WrestleMania debut defeating Jimmy Snuka to begin an unprecedented undefeated WrestleMania streak. The Daily Mirror, a British national tabloid newspaper, ranked this as the 7th greatest winning streak in sports history.
It wasn’t until WrestleMania 9 that the event was finally held in the outdoor venue. It also marked the first an only time the WWF Championship swapped twice during the event. Yokozuna defeated Bret Hart to become the champion only to turn around and lose it to Hulk Hogan. At WrestleMania X in Madison Square Garden Bret Hart was defeated by his brother Owen only to turn around and win the WWF Championship in the main event becoming the only man to do so. Also Razor Ramon took on Shawn Michaels in and iconic ladder match. The next year at WrestleMania 11 Shawn Michaels and Bret Hart went toe to toe in a 60-minute iron man match considered to be the best match in the history of the event. Shawn Michaels ended an emotional journey to win the WWF Championship title. At WrestleMania 13 Bret Hart and Steve Austin went toe to toe in a submissions match which earned much acclaim by the wrestling world. A year later at WM 14 an interesting situation had come about when Mike Tyson, the man billed as the Special Enforcer in the WM main event where Champion Shawn Michaels would be defending against Steve Austin, had joined with DX. However during the event Tyson revealed his alliances to lie with Austin. Steve Austin became the champion and ushered in the “Attitude Era” in WWF.
WrestleMania 15 marked the first of many epic WrestleMania encounters that took place between Steve Austin and The Rock. WrestleMania 2000 featured the first ever triangle latter match pitting the Hardy Boys against the Dudley Boys against Edge and Christian. This would lead to the very popular TLC matches in months to come as well as TLC 2 with the same teams at WM 17. WrestleMania 17 was the pinnacle of the 1990s Wrestling Boom as well as the pinnacle of the Attitude Era. It was also the first WrestleMania held after the dissolution of the companies largest rival, World Championship Wrestling. WrestleMania 18 was the last event to be produced under the WWF name and also saw The Rock defeating Hulk Hogan, Steve Austin defeating Scott Hall, and The Undertaker defeating Ric Flair all three matches pitting WWF superstars against former WWF stars who had been active in WCW. WrestleMania 19 saw Steve Austin’s last match to date when he faced the Rock for the third time also Shawn Michaels defeated Chris Jericho in his first WM match in five years.
WrestleMania 20 was the first produced under the World Wrestling Entertainment and saw the final match to date (until WM28 that is) of the Rock and the final matches in WWE of Bill Goldberg and Brock Lesnar whose match was officiated by Steve Austin. WrestleMania 21 saw the beginning of the Money in the Bank Ladder match which guaranteed the winner a contract for a WWE title match anytime within the year. It also featured a highly acclaimed match between Shawn Michaels and Kurt Angle. WrestleMania 22 and 23 would see the continuance of the Money in the Bank ladder match as well as John Cena’s continued success as WWE Champion.
WrestleMania 24, my first WrestleMania, was the second to be held in an outdoor venue at the Citrus Bowl in Orlando, Florida. It saw the continued Money in the Bank match as well as the ECW Championship’s first WrestleMania defense where Kane won in a record 8 seconds. It also showcased boxing world champion Floyd Mayweather defeating the Big Show. Not to mention the highly acclaimed and incredibly emotional epic clash of Shawn Michaels against Ric Flair.
It was at WrestleMania 26 that Shawn Michaels career came to an end when he tried for the second year in a row to end the Undertaker’s legendary undefeated WrestleMania streak. Also Bret Hart returned to WWE. Over twelve years removed from the Montreal screw job incident Hart returned to WrestleMania to defeat Vince McMahone in a No-Holds-Barred match.
Last year at WrestleMania 27 where I was again in attendance, The Rock returned after seven years as host of WrestleMania. Trish Stratus returned as well. Triple H attempted to both end the Undertakers streak and avenge Shawn Michaels to no avail, Edge had his last match with WWE, and the Rock Saluted his many fans after laying out the Miz and John Cena in the main event.
This year things get intense with John Cena going against the Rock. The Rock is the epitome of entertainment and an icon in wrestling and Cena is the icon of wrestling for the new generation. It’s one generation versus the next. Meanwhile, while the generations take shots at each other, the last of the true greats are meeting as Triple H attempts for the second year in a row to end the Undertaker’s 19-0 WrestleMania winning streak with Shawn Michaels as special guest referee. There is a lot to look forward to but rather than me repeating the million’s of reviews going on before April 1st I’d rather just refer you to one.
A’ight folks… if it’s your cup of tea I hope you’ll tune in. If not I hope this brief history has been informative and perhaps a little intriguing. April 1st, Miami Florida, WrestleMania 28! I’ll be watching from my father’s house in Alabama!
So I recently saw the aforementioned movie. Now I must admit that when I first saw the big poster of Daniel Craig and saw his name along side Harrison Ford’s it tickled my interest in a way that left my interest very tired and wanting a drink of water afterward. However the title Cowboys & Aliens suddenly left my interest quite flaccid… I think this metaphor has crossed a line into a very terrible place. Moving on.
So Daniel Craig wakes up in the middle of the desert with iron on his wrist, a bloody scar on his abdomen, and a Swiss cheese memory rivaling that of Scott Bakula (Yay! Quantum Leap reference). Actually I’m not so sure Sam didn’t leap into Jake Lonergan’s (Dainel Craig’s) body for most of this film. His stronge silent type could be explained away as him listening to Al tell him what Ziggy thinks about the aliens attacking western settlers. Hmm… anyway we all know the iron on his wrist is an alien device. Stupid title and it’s damn spoilers. However the angry fellows who arrive on scene having freshly scalped some Indians think it’s a sure sign of his criminal activity and try to cash in. However he quickly dispatches and possibly kills all four men. Hmm… yea, this film is far divorced from Quantum Leap.
Daniel Craig quickly became my second favorite James Bond after Casino Royale and he continues to impress with his portrayal of tragic hero Jake Lonergan in Cowboys & Aliens. He’s too damn good at selling a punch as well as an emotion and it only helps that he’s acting along side the man that wrote the book on selling punches, Harrison Ford. That’s not to say Ford can’t sell an emotion but let’s be honest. Most people think Harrison Ford and think Indiana Jones and epic stunts and battles. However, Ford’s portrayal of grizzled and begrudging Civil War vet Woodrow Dolarhyde along side Craig’s mysterious outlaw searching for vindication and revenge is a partnership creating such real human drama that honestly I forgot at times I was watching a science fiction film. And to be quite honest this film could have easily become an awesome western film.
Lonergan arrives in town and breaks into the house of a county preacher who, after discovering Lonergan has no memory, decides to patch up his rather odd wound. Shortly there after the town saloon comes under fire by the town bully, Percy. He’s bullying the saloon owner and towns folk under the shelter of being son to colonel Dolarhyde. And there we have it. Small former mining camp under the icy grip of a powerful antigovernment war vet turned cattleman and his posse. Classic tale. I half expected Doc Holiday and the Wyatt Earp to show up and throw down against Harrison Ford at the OK Coral. Of course Ford would’ve smoke’em and changed the course of history.
I’m getting off topic. So Lonergan of course has no intention of bending to the spoiled brat and knees him in the pecker. When Lonergan turns to leave Percy tries to intimidate him and accidentally shoots a federal marshal. Whoops! Percy’s in trouble now no matter who papa is, and the plot thickens. Nothing turns the tide of a story quicker than pissing of the antagonist by sending his son to prison. Unfortunately the sheriff sees Lonergan’s picture on a wanted poster and we get the oh so sad news that our hero might be a villain! But there’s hope for us as the audience because he still doesn’t remember it. Yay! Sad face though because a young lady, who seems suspiciously interested in what we know is the alien weapon on Lonergan’s wrist, helps the sheriff catch Lonergan. Meanwhile mysterious white lights happen to incinerate half a herd of cattle belonging to Dolarhyde and he shows his sadistic torturing skills as he interrogates/punishes the one survivor. Understandably so the story of bright lights blowin’ up a man’s cattle sound to be the tale of a greenhorn whose been knockin’ back some shine. The news of Percy’s incarceration brings the interrogation to an unfortunate end. So the stage is set. Lonergan and Percy are in the coach heading for Santa Fe with Dolarhyde and posse barring down on them. The drama keeps coming! Turns out sheriff isn’t giving Percy up to dear ol’ dad and beyond that Dolarhyde recognizes Lonergan as the outlaw who robbed his stage coach and made off with his gold. Hooray for our assumed hero! At least he robbed the villain!
At this point we’ve come to the climax or at least midpoint of a good western adventure in about thirty minutes. This is where the extraterrestrial element is elegantly and classily introduced with soft mysterious music as the town notices the entrancing and peculiar lights approaching town in the still night air. Cue alien attack with scatted abductions.
As you can imagine this event turns the dynamic of the relationships between our established characters on it’s head. Suddenly our heroes have learned that Lonergan’s weapon is a weapon and they’re faced with the task of mounting a rescue for their lost friends and family by tracking the alien that escaped from the one ship Lonergan shot down with his alien weapon. I’d rather not spoil much more of the movie beyond this point. Suffice it to say it continues heavy on the western side but includes some iconic and classic alien film imagery. Not to mention there exists a subtle hint at the arguably greatest extraterrestrial horror film of all time Alien when our heroes take shelter from a night rain in an almost otherworldly overturned steamboat in the middle of the desert. Dolarhyde’s past begins to come to light and reveals his character to be less black and white and more human. As Lonergan begins to regain his memory we learn that his sins may be absolvable as he struggles with being a good man whose done bad things leading to tragic consequences. There also exists a quite compelling segregate parent story between Dolarhyde and his right hand man, Nat Colorado (Adam Beach).
As for the odd premise of cowboys interacting with aliens… consider this. A number of brilliant minds have explained a sort of paleo-contact theory. Basically certain artifacts have been found which are alleged to represent a higher technological knowledge than is to perceived to have existed at the times they were manufactured. Were they manufactured by aliens or humans who gained the necessary knowledge from aliens? If the ancient Egyptians had help building the pyramids from benevolent aliens why then is it such a stretch to believe more hostile aliens might have come in contact with western settlers in order to mine gold. As for how the premise stacks up as a film remember the western really has been merged with other genres for a long time. The iconography of the west has been borrowed and updated with science fiction by such favorites as Star Wars and cult sci-fi favorites as Fire Fly.
I’ll be honest, I was skeptic of the premise to begin with too. It felt a little pulpy and there was some pulp to it. However the very real human emotion couched in the western frontier period felt by the cowboys coupled with the classic horror thriller imagery and science fiction imagination conveyed in the aliens created a marriage whose outcome was an exciting and entertaining film. Also a shout out to Legacy Effects and ILM (literally the two best creature and special effects companies in the business) and to John Favreau’s direction. It may not be remembered as the best film of all time or of it’s release year, but if you want to watch an entertaining action adventure film I would definitely recommend it!
Suspend your disbelief and join me next time when somethin’ else is gonna happen!
So something you should know about me… for the better part of five years from 2000 to 2005 I was the head promoter for a backyard wrestling territory (which is a fancy way of saying I was a backyard wrestler or yarder). Yea, go ahead and do what judging you will and when you’re done we can all look back and laugh at and enjoy the stories I accumulated doing so.
In early 2001 I had just suffered a huge heart ache when my first real crush had proclaimed nothing would happen between us and that she and her family were moving to Texas at the end of the school year. At the time this was the end of the world. As such I had a weakened emotional state and as such was susceptible to contracting new habits. Now I had for a long time been opposed to the idea of Professional Wrestling. As a child I had watched such performers as the Undertaker, Hulk Hogan, and Jake “The Snake” Roberts and had enjoyed it immensely. However my mom had exposed the business for me by revealing that the matches in pro-wrestling have predetermined outcomes in order to heighten the entertainment value. You’re gonna make me say it aren’t you. Okay! It’s… fake. It was once kept highly secret that wrestling was staged but it is now a widely accepted open secret. However the true nature of the performances are not discussed by the promotion in order to sustain the willing suspension of disbelief. Having revealed this mass conspiracy to me my mom had turned something mildly interesting into something quite stupid. Fast forward to freshman year where I’m in the second stage of the Kübler-Ross Model (Five stages of Grief). I had skipped right by denial and gone straight to anger. It so happens that anger can be satiated by violence and despite it’s entertainment and (dare I say) artistic side Pro Wrestling is a violent passion play. My buddy Jerry was on hand with his wrestling video games to sooth my restless heart and, much to my mother’s chagrin, my pro wrestling fandom was returning.
So my journey as a yarder started with video games and evolved to video tapped wrestling matches on the trampoline (very dangerous do not attempt) and later became more serious when my grandfather and I actually built a ring. It turns out wrestling on a proper ring is much safer than on a trampoline. The Millbrook Wrestling Federation (MWF) became 2 eXtreme Wrestling (2XW) ended in 2005 and later became Elite Wrestling Federation (EWF) after I left. Look’em up on facebook, EWF Millbrook.
So in the final months of 2XW a friend of mine, Justin D. aka Borden, had brought along a family friend from church who had actually promoted indie groups before and was in line to do so again. He evaluated the young men who had carved their wrestling talent along side me and decided a hand full of us were worth something and of the handful two had a marketable look. Those two were David (Dave Century) and Justin B. (Mike Savage). So the two of them were invited along to perform at an actual independent wrestling promotion. I was unable to attend the first show they did but Jerry was there playing security. I made it to the second and despite my tiny stature I too played security. It was at their third show that I finally stepped in the ring myself.
So here we were in this tiny little gym. Folks were making there way in little by little. I was only there to support my boys but I did have my gear with me. David and Justin had fought one on one at both the previous shows. At the second one a masked fellow named Joy Killa had cost Justin his match. So on this night there was to be a tag match in which Century (David) would team with Joy Killa against Savage (Justin) and Showtime. Justin’s girlfriend (and my ex) Katrina and our friend Kevin were there in the crowd to watch. So I was backstage in the tiny hallway we were all crammed into talking to the promoter and the only actual name there. He was a big macho guy who wore a jump suit, colored flames on his head with magic marker, and called himself Death Row.
Now as it turns out another match on the card that night was a guy named Apollo Apocalypse who was supposed to have a squash match with an actual collegiate wrestler. Incase you don’t know a squash match is were one guy completely destroys the other guy with no real difficulty. As luck would have it the “real” wrestler wasn’t going to show so they offered the match to me. I was thrilled and ran out to my truck to grab my gear. There was a slight set back when I discovered I had locked my keys in my car but that situation was overcome and I headed back inside. As I walked into the tiny hallway/dressing room I looked up and at the end of the room there stood a seven foot, five hundred pound black man talking to the promoter.
“Hey, Brent,” says the promoter who is pointing at me, “That’s the guy you’re fighting tonight.” I walked right up to that leviathan, looked up into his eyes, and said, “I’ll try not to hurt ya.” He laughed and we became quick friends. Turns out he was one of the sweetest guys I’ve ever known.
Originally the segment was supposed to be, I come out and rag on pro wrestling as being a fix and that I’m a genuine athlete and I can beat anyone in the building. He comes down, choke slams me, splashes (jumps on) me, and wins. However after we got to talking a bit we discovered we all had ambitions of making this squash match more than it really was. Now the way we had things set up was the faces (good guys) were entering from the right left side of the gym and the heels (bad guys) were entering from the right. Apollo Apocalypse (Brent) had gone out into the crowd to sit with his family whilst he waited for the match. I was hanging out by the face entrance with the other guys. When the time came I ran around to the heel side to get ready. We happened to be an upper card match that night. Actually we were right before the main event. So as I stood there getting into character ol’ Death Row comes walking around bouncing like a Mexican jumping bean and telling me I better get squashed quick. I didn’t say anything since A. There’s kind of a hierarchal system in wrestling with names and vets at the top and yardie’s so far off the bottom it isn’t funny and B. He was kind of a big gorilla. But rest assure I was definatly thinking to myself where he couldn’t hear me, “I’ll get squashed in what time I want.”
My theme music (Raise Up by Saliva) hit and I marched out there head held high over the rest and proceeded to tell everyone wrestling was stupid and I could beat anyone in the building. There was one young lady in particular that seemed quite excited to see me get my ass kicked which meant I was doing my job quite well. When Apollo stood up in the back of the crowd and marched down to the ring the crowd was practically giddy with anticipation at the thought of me getting pounded. Of course I left the ring and tried to run away but the referee told me if I didn’t return I was fired. So I did and attempted to start the match with a knuckle lock. Of course he overpowered me and through me to the ground. So I tried to throw on a hammer lock. He flicked his arm and sent me flying across the ring. Finally I attempted a spear (tackle). I hit him like an egg against a brick wall. So after one last right hook with absolutely no affect, I leapt at the behemoth and was caught in a choke slam. The crowd popped and Apollo jumped up in the air bringing down every last pound on top of me. The bloodthirsty crowd cried out for more and I was met with yet another bone crushing splash. The referee helped me out with the crowd cheering at my misfortune. When I exited the gym Death Row was still bouncing around like frog. But when I got back around to where the other guys were I was met with gasps of shock and awe. No, I in fact was not injured and yes, I was in fact awesome. I had turned what was written as a squash match into a pretty successful segment.
Months later I was invited back by the same promoter to have an actual match again my buddy Mike Savage (Justin). We arrived to find the show had been canceled without notice. Truth be told the guy running the show was kind of unreliable. Anyway I had had my brush with performing for a large crowd and I was bitten by the bug. It lasted a month or two longer until the stress of running the 2XW shows got the better of me and I conspired with a few others to burn our ring to the ground. Oh, well time and tide I suppose.
